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The November Witch: Movember and Men’s Mental Health

Water

Ever stop and think about water? The sheer magnitude of it – it can be fog, clouds, ice, or steam. It can be something that brings peace to you when watching over a very still lake. It can show its beauty when reflecting the sun or rippling under a gentle breeze. It can also be terrifying in a storm, dooming ships and sailors, or flooding a village. So powerful and yet also very vulnerable to contamination. It is vital to the existence of every known form of life, yet it yields no food or energy. We use it for transportation, industry, entertainment, cleaning, and for survival.

No taste, transparent, and colorless.

I write this while thinking about the month of November, and the topic of men’s mental health. I am in no way an expert, but I would say that I’m a well-traveled sailor in this department.

Mental health in general is a very vast and complicated topic at the very least. Like water, it presents itself in so many different ways. I took the time to think, why “men’s mental health”? Why not mental health in general? I think in simple terms, we generally accept many stereotypes in life along with a variety of social expectations and traditions. Men have stereotypes too. Slowly, the world is growing and learning to deviate from these expectations, but there is a long way to go.

A lot of the pressures that men fall into are fairly straightforward. Be masculine, be strong, be tall, be a good provider, and generally have resiliency for others to be able to lean on you. Be assertive, and never ever have a deep thought!  I fear that sounds overly simplistic, but I think people can relate to what I am saying. But here is exactly one of the issues – not all men are built the same. What if you don’t fit the traditional expectations? No matter how much equality is talked about, there are different responses to people based on gender, sexuality, race, and physical appearance, and men do not escape this reality either. We see this rapidly growing in many other areas in society where intolerance has a very large platform, and people’s ability to target and discriminate seems to be on the rise. Support is certainly not abundant either; the harsh reality is that when a man starts breaking down, there are precious few options available.

I have made it a mission in my own journey to at the very least be PRESENT and aware that these challenges exist. By doing so, many men have been much more open to speaking about the hurt they are going through, and to try and participate in solutions. Full disclosure, I also do this so that I too can have people to rely on and talk me through this tough journey. If I had to guess, I would say that depression is the one evil trait that has such a stranglehold on many men. It can be paralyzing, and even worse it is isolating. It is extremely hard to summon the strength to get help with this.

And now, why water? It is complex. It is fragile. It is strong, it can provide life, and it can be damaged. If you can recognize the magnitude of water, recognizing your own humanity in its full and beautiful form is a good start on how to manage its vulnerabilities. Treat yourself with the same care and consideration. Some water needs to be treated to be healthy. When healthy it can transcend anything. It is beautiful, and it is essential to life, just like mental health.  It can be used to reach new things, and it can be used to wash things away. YOU, your soul, and your life is all of these things too. Reach out, communicate, and NEVER lose sight of your value. The strongest of all men are the ones that know their vulnerabilities, and with that knowledge, you can heal, and you can help others heal too.

You are not alone. Be like water

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